making moves

fear of the unknown.

a lot of things have been going on at work lately
things that have started to make me reflect and reevaluate what it is that i want, the direction that i want to go
it's frustrating sometimes because with any decision that you make, you want that certainty that it's the right move.

for time to pass and in hindsight feel like the moves you made weren't necessarily the right ones are only experiences had, lessons learned, and nothing else. at the end of the day there's no point in regretting things, it's always about moving forward.

but to go forward risking the same thing happening as there's no guarantee for anything in this lifetime is a leap of faith that makes me hesitant.

pretty exhausted tonight, but looking forward to unwinding a bit.
i live for weekends, they keep me sane. weekends, and dear friends (:
what's not to love.

t g i f--

as long as you're still smilin.

last night, 10:40pm---
Ji: HAHAHAHA BAHAHAHA
me: ahahahhaahhahahahha
hHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH
ahahhahahahahhahahahahahaahhaha
JIIN
Ji: AHAHAHAHA!!!!!
me: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAH
damn. i miss gchat.
Ji: AHAHAHAHAHA

missing g-chat, but i miss ji more (:

missing italy

where to next..

what i'm working with.

no internet, numeric keypad cell phone
4th gen ipod nano (thought i lost this!)

texting has become challenging lols
but my new(er) tunes on this old nano has been fun
i don't even think my iphone transitioned the beginnings and ends while songs were streaming?
had to uncheck more than three quarters of my itunes library last night to fit under 8G's, but i'll take it.
at least both of these are in color.  no color would've been a little depressing lols

i guess it's a little~ funny
heh (:
xmon

honestly?

i have so much sh** going on right now.



but i'm still


happy

my new favorite video

stumbled across this video 2 weeks ago, and i can't stop playing it on repeat.

The Mountain from TSO Photography on Vimeo.

not only are the images absolutely stunning, but the track on it is really what makes it so beautiful, so moving.

it makes me miss playing the piano, something that i did for 14 years, and then just never continued when i went to college.

but a piece like this...
makes me want to buy a good keyboard and start playing again.

track is called "Nuvole Bianche," by Ludovico Einaudi
means "white clouds" in Italian

cheers to the end of a long monday--
xmon

disconnected

to make a long story short, my phone died this weekend.

you always take for granted what you don't have, and i'm already going through iphone withdrawal.
decided that i'd go to sleep earlier than usual tonight so that i'd be on point for work tomorrow.

only to realize that no phone = no alarm clock...........
nor could i ask someone to wake me up because my phone DIED
complete fail.

lolololols
(downloaded an alarm clock onto my mac, hoping that it successfully wakes me up tomorrow)

phone-less, music-less, gchat-less
feeling a little disconnected.... but will just have to get through it.
crazy how dependent we are on technology-

cheers to getting through the week
already looking forward to friday.
xxmon

rewind

songs i'm feeling tonight---
*coming up - lupe feat mdma
*aston martin music - rick ross feat drake, chrisette
*we run LA - ya boy feat. dr hollywood
*intro (thank you&you) - big bang
*hands up - 2PM
*christian dior denim flow - kanye feat kid cudi, pusha t, john legend, lloyd banks, ryan leslie
*bass head (original mix) - bassnectar
*i remember (caspa remix) - deadmau5
*if you want me to stay - ne-yo
*ego (remix) - beyonce feat. kanye
*comfortable - lil wayne feat babyface
*change me - keri hilson feat akon
*best i ever had - drake feat nicki minaj
*best thing i never had (original version) - beyonce
*party & bullshit (ratatat remix) - biggie
*it's like that - run dmc
*lay me down - ti feat rico love
*shutterbug - big boi
*all i want is you - miguel feat jcole
*runaway love (remix) - bieber feat kanye & raekwon
*day one fans - theophilus london
*let the drummer kick - citizen cope
*i need you - the dey
*lady don't tek no - latryx

*nobody - kate earl
*dance in the dark - gaga
*killing me softly - lauryn hill
*fallin out - keyshia cole
*rescue song (rac remix) - mr little jeans
*intro to love - august
*hear me out - frou frou
*analyze - tim be told
*stay up - george nozuka
*superhuman - chris brown feat keri
*stronger (remix) - keri hilson

feel free to ask for tracks if you're interested.
cheers to fridays.
xmon

so. tired.

i don't remember the last time i was this tired.
first week back from vacay and it was a little tough playing catch up -- from work, with sleep (feel like i'm still jetlagged), with friends.

but i've managed to tie up most of the loose ends, get back into my city routine, and even made time to hang with friends -- movies, dinners&drinks, and even a birthday.

but i'm still lacking in a good night's sleep.

which is why
i'm excited to go home tonight
and do absolutely nothing.

tgif (:
xmon

line of the day

IT successfully blocked gchat at work while i was in italy.
i miss being online with my friends.


(via email):
me: life without gchat. damn.
ash: what kind of life is that?? use your iphone.

Happy Birthday, Grandpa!

Today was my Grandfather's 80th birthday -- in Korea, 80 is a particularly significant milestone and in efforts to show him our love, my sister and I made a video for him (haven't seen him since January, and he lives in Korea).

Definitely had some failed attempts..

Blanked out.. 

Technical difficulties..

but finally got it together

Happy Birthday, Grandpa!
할아버지 생일축하합니다 (:

Italy.

was. beautiful--

but not without some drama, to say the least (:

when we got to rome's airport, mary and i realized that both of our bags were not on the conveyor belt.  we filed a claim with the airline (along with a handful of other passengers from the same flight in the same situation).  with high hopes that it'd come perhaps on the next flight, we stayed at the airport for another 3 hours.

they didn't come.

we were told that the bags would probably come by the next day, and that they'd be forwarded to the hotel we'd be staying at.  without a choice we gave the hotel's address and headed in for the night.  one day, no biggie.

to make a long story short, our bags never came while we were in italy.
every day we had our concierge desks (3 hotels total) call alitalia (worst. airline. ever! DO NOT fly with them.) in hopes of tracking our bags.  we got mixed answers every day -- from the bags not being physically located, one out of two found with the others' status unknown, both located and told that they'd be sent to our next hotel in florence...then venice... every day we'd come back, anxious to see if our bags had come, and every day we were let down.  without a choice, on our last day, we asked that our bags be sent to the states.  even then the status of our bags were still ambiguous.  all the international calls we had to make to our insurance company, the airlines, finding wi-fi to use the internet, write emails.... so many unnecessary headaches, so much steam boiling inside of us...on this wonderful vacation that we decided to take.  thank god for the spanish steps, as we'd grab beers and hang out there at night, because being cooped up in our hotel room after hearing that our bags had not come yet again was a little heartbreaking.

not having our belongings definitely took a slight toll on us -- our pretty dresses, basic necessities, i wasn't feeling so well when we first got to amsterdam / rome and my medicines were all in my luggage.. things that you prepare for / take into consideration while packing to make things comfortable on a trip, all up in the air.  it was such an inconvenience!  my camera charger was in there too, so my camera died basically the first day (mary had her camera's charger with her, pictures to come later).

but we did our best, and didn't let it ruin our trip.
we hand washed our clothes with soap, and used the hairdryers to dry them.  bought basic necessities, and just...winged it.  we didn't buy too much abroad because we sincerely thought that our things would come the next day.
basically we saw rome, siena, florence, and venice ALL in one day (;

we didn't miss any of our planned tours, and stuck to our original schedules.  i'm pretty proud of us.  we left italy not sure if we'd get our things back at all..  we even took off friday so that we could go to the airline's supposed office to let up a storm, only to find out that the airline's address was solely a mailroom, and no such corporate office existed at that address.  we quit being on hold after being informed that the call wait would be 40+ minutes.  hung up, and got bloody mary's instead.

a part of me thinks that all of this happened for a reason -- it made me realize how possessions can be replaced, and even if some can't, there are more important things; possessions are possessions, and at the end of the day, we're still blessed in the sense that what we did have was still a lot more than what a lot of other people in the world have.

definitely was a humbling experience, and we left with still a beautiful impression of italy.  came back to the city without our belongings, but accepted that all we could do was hope, and wait.

mary just got a call today from JFK, saying that both of our bags were in their possession, and would be delivered today.

(:

what's not to love.